Gotta love your boss

Today I had my annual performance evaluation. Never mind that I am on vacation and that I had to drive 1.5 hours to attend it. Apparently I am doing a good job, having improved from last year, not enough to raise my score/grade. I am so very tired of doing what is expected--even going above and beyond, only to be beat up on my performance. I have over 34 years with this company, never had a problem till this anal controlling person was put as our district head. He has it out for 8 of us for some reason. My store makes money, I stay on top of programs, I score high in employee engagement. I am so pissed, I have talked to that friend that I know and she has a part time position--15/20 hours at $16/hour. I am taking it, getting my foot into hotel management, then leaving when the time is right. Going full time with them. Or maybe I will contact kwiktrip also, like most of our employees that are fed up with the way our company is going. Looking into getting our windows replaced. Have someone coming tomorrow and on the 17th for estimates. Can't wait to see what that cost is going to be. We have 15 windows that we would need to replace. Will update this weekend.

Wish I knew how

I wish I knew how to find a way to bring another child to our family. We are trying to get rid of credit card debt by taking out a loan against my profit sharing account after paying down the debt thru a debt management company the last 3 years. We still aren't where I would like to see us financially, but we are improving. Now Tyler has started college and since we didn't set up any accounts we are having to take out loans to help with his schooling. Ugh. It just seems never ending. I know we have the hearts to bring him into our lives, but the finances still scare me. How can I find a way to fix that? We have changed so much already in our lives. You see other families that seem to have less, with more debt be able to feel comfortable bringing in other children, children with or without special needs. I pray nightly for a sign that this is meant to be, butas of yet no sign has appeared. I have even asked a friend about doing part-time work for them to try and raise money. Please help me see that yes we are meant to be Joshua's family or not.

Please pray

Please pray for the people in Haiti. For our daughter's orphanage, that they weather the storms upon them tonight. They have been thru so much already.

Change is coming

Starting to wash Tyler's things for college--his towels, sheets, blankets and such. This weekend need to go thru things to make sure we have everything for Wednesday. I can't believe that he only has 9 days till move in day. Today I made out 2 weeks of schedules so that I can have some vacation time off. I can hardly wait. The day we move Tyler to his dorm, kaylee has her appointment at children's hospital, the girls have open house at both schools. I thought we were done doing something at 3 different schools on the same day--guess not. Not really have much fun at work anymore. I am too old to start over though. Have been trying to find something else for awhile, just nothing out there. I worked for the same company for too many years--34 years. Time for a change soon. Lori

So Proud

Yesterday was a very proud moment for both Bruce and I. Tyler received his Eagle award. The highest honor a Boy Scout can achieve. Very few scouts make it to this level. He always said he wanted to be like his uncle Dave when he started scouting by getting to that level. Dave was even able to attend the ceremony and participate in the ceremony. He shared the day with his friend Nathaniel and lots of family and friends. Even my parents drove over to attend the ceremony, as this was also their 51st wedding anniversary weekend. Thank you Mom and Dad for coming and spending the time with us. Today we spent the time shopping for college items for him as he only has 1.5 weeks left before we move him into his dorm. Bought him a tv tonight so he is making sure that everything is working with it. On Friday we noticed that our cat Tiny had an infection on one of his ears that was very painful to touch. I have been cleaning it out with hydrogen peroxide and putting antibiotic ointment onto it. Tonight it seems like it is finally working and not as painful for him. Just don't understand what he did to his ear, but at least it appears we have it healing now. Kaylee has been wanting the movie Hunger Games as it came out this weekend. Boy did she hit the jackpot, we had the game yesterday on sale for a price that was cheaper than anyone else. So with my discount added in, she got a deal. Nice cool day, nice family day, hopefully a week that will be better than the last 2 have been these past 2 weeks(haven't had a day off in close to 3 weeks). Really need to find different work--somewhere that appreciates me. Have a good week. Lori

So tired

I am so tired of drama. It is running strong in the store, in the company and again in the family. Why does it need to be around? Why can't I deal with it better? Why can't I feel happy about about things, why do I think I need more? Do I have more of me to give? I a, having to work 2 weeks straight without a day off due to the drama at the store. Why? All I want to do is provide a home for my family, bring in 1, maybe 2 more. Am I being selfish in doing this? Am I doing this for the right reason's? I sure hope so.

Tomorrow

Tyler comes home tomorrow!!! Can hardly wait, Bruce is leaving around 6am to drive almost 3 hours to get him and bring him home. It is also Bruce's birthday tomorrow. Chrislande and I made him a cake tonight, she cracked the eggs and put all the liquids into the mixing bowl, turned it on and...licked the bowl. It was really cute. I was looking at Reece's rainbow, Josiah has had money added to his account. I mentioned to Bruce that his adoption would be paid for, his comment was--we are still dealing with problems with Chrislande, how can we deal with another? I just mentioned that she is getting better, that we could do it. I have planted the seed, let's see if it is meant to be. Also, I asked someone today if her husband might have a part-time at home position. She questioned if I was serious, I said I was. She is going to talk to her husband. We will see where that takes us. Please pray for positivity. Lori